a/s/l: Thee MVPs

(Photo Credit: Neelam Khan Vela)

(Photo Credit: Neelam Khan Vela)

Remember the days of the old schoolyard? Remember when Myspace was a thing? Remember those time-wasting, laborious quizzes that everyone used to love so much? Birthday Cake For Breakfast is bringing them back! 

Every couple of weeks, an unsuspecting band will be subject to the same old questions about dead bodies, Hitler, crying and crushes.  

This week: Every single ding-dong member of radsters THEE MVPS!

CHARLIE

CHARLIE

a/s/l?

26/M/GRAVESEND.

Have you ever seen a dead body?
I saw a MOTO GP rider come off his bike at Brands Hatch and die.

Who is your favourite Simpsons character?
Burnsy.

What T-Shirt are you wearing?
My Bruce Spingsteen shirt I wear 200% more than every other shirt I have.

What did your last text message say?
Thanks bab!

What’s the last song you listened to?
Followed By the Sea by Fucking Invincible.

How did you meet the people in your band?
A mixture of gumtree/email/hip hop shows/playing dead shows in brighton.

What’s the first record you bought?
I think it was a Will Smith – Men in Black Cassette. My Mum gave me ‘Odelay’ by Beck when it came out too.

What was your favourite VHS growing up?
Muppets Christmas Carol!

When was the last time you cried?
Back in October.

Have you ever kissed someone & regretted it?
Nope! Not even the dudes!

Best Physical Feature?
Hair.

Worst physical feature?
Hair.

Reasonably ok/not bad feature that you’re not fussed about?
Hair.

Do you have any pets?
No but you can give me a greyhound.

Ever picked up any injuries on tour?
Only the usual aches and pains from rocking out. In an old band I dislocated my shoulder doing a cartwheel with a guitar though…

What did you do for your last birthday?
BBQ.

Name something you CANNOT wait for?
Getting off work… always.

Do you have a crush on someone?
Alexa Chung… always.

What’s the shittest experience you’ve had as a musician?
I use to play in a noise band like Arab on Radar and Coachwhips – we played for ten minutes at New Cross Inn once with a 10-piece soul band that covered ‘Bullet In The Head’ by Rage Against The Machine. The drummer couldn’t pay for a coke with his beer ticket… complete waste of time. Playing in a band is a laugh and a privilege though, no one should whinge because you’re dad ain’t making you do it and you’re not in the Jackson 5.

If you could go back in time, how far would you go?
Whenever the point was I could see MC5 without them being too drugged out (if that exists).

How do you want to die?
Definitely not like how that bad guy dies at the end of Total Recall.

What’s your favourite thing about pizza?
Everyone being a hater when I order Hawaiian.

What are you craving right now?
Sleep.

Have you ever been on a horse?
No, but Jo can ride two at once so that covers the pair of us.

What did you dream about last night?
I don’t rightly remember, though I do keep having that dream where I join The E Street Band.

If you could go back in time and kill the baby Hitler, would you?
Probably? I reckon you could probably educate someone into not being a fascist dictator though, that’d interest me a whole lot more than murdering a baby to be honest.

Do you like Chinese food?
Yea but what I really wanna talk about is burritos.

Have you ever been on TV?
Nope! I’m 20 years too late to be on a decent episode of The Simpsons too.

Ever meet someone famous?
A few yes, most of them nice and normal, pretty hard to be mythical when you’re not Lemmy or Bowie and take shits and have a twitter account just like everybody else.

What do you want to be when you grow up?
A bit more responsible.

ALEX

ALEX

a/s/l?

27/M/London.

Have you ever seen a dead body?
nope.

Who is your favourite Simpsons character?
otto.

What T-Shirt are you wearing?
Ninja Tune.

What did your last text message say?
Good Luck!

What’s the last song you listened to?
Solange Knowles – ‘F.U.B.U – what an album!

How did you meet the people in your band?
Joe and George www. – Technically I met Charlie when my old band played with his at a show in Brighton, it was the last show my old band played & he leant me his amp…we then also went to Thee Satisfaction together before we actually played music in a band..I replied to his add on Gumtree before realising i’d met him before.

What’s the first record you bought?
Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water.

What was your favourite VHS growing up?
Rainbow.

When was the last time you cried?
last year I think.

Have you ever kissed someone & regretted it?
no regrets.

Best Physical Feature?
these hips don’t lie.

Worst physical feature?
My legs are like string beans.

Reasonably ok/not bad feature that you’re not fussed about?
palm of my hands.

Do you have any pets?
I looked after a mates rabbit once, I renamed it ‘Earl Grey’ & was gonna make a hat for it…but then it bit me, threw up in it’s little house & we fell out (me & the rabbit)…since then no.

Ever picked up any injuries on tour?
I recently toured America with a really terrible Strat (my fault really). I bought a les paul JR for the US tour but it was terrible so I swapped it for a pawn shop Strat. What I didn’t realise at the time was the frets were slightly coming away from the neck, which wasn’t apparent when I was playing sitting down in the store. As soon as we started playing shows they were shredding my fingers big time, I was ending shows with really bloody fingers… I had to resort to gaffer taping my fingers before each show as medical tape and plasters just sweated off!! Lesson learned, don’t by a pawn shop guitar for a 3 week tour!

What did you do for your last birthday?
Dinner with my Girlfriend.

Name something you CANNOT wait for?
I try not to look too far ahead.

Do you have a crush on someone?
My Girlfriend.

What’s the shittest experience you’ve had as a musician?
I guess you always have bad shows that at the time really bum you out… We’ve played some where we finished and literally deathly silence after as people were hating it…also at our biggest show to date which we played recently, someone from the crowd threw a bottle at me…I was a bit bummed at the time as it was going really well I thought hah, but you have to just laugh at it to be honest… Being a musician is so much fun and a privilege so I can’t really say I have shit times!

If you could go back in time, how far would you go?
I’d like very much to see a dinosaur!

How do you want to die?
I dunno…but I have had a long term ambition to be taxidermied when I die, with my hand held out so I can be kept as a family heirloom and maybe they can use my hand as a key dish or for loose change…sounds weird but I think it would be funny.

What’s your favourite thing about pizza?
There is always a way to add more cheese…

What are you craving right now?
a pear.

Have you ever been on a horse?
Yep.

What did you dream about last night?
hmm, I can’t remember – listening to the Solange album perhaps.

If you could go back in time and kill the baby Hitler, would you?
I think i’d try to get someone else to do it…i’ve not really got killing in me.

Do you like Chinese food?
Not a great deal, although to be honest I don’t think I’ve ever gone to a ‘proper’ Chinese resturant.

Have you ever been on TV?
maybe the camera panned across me at an Arsenal game in the crowd…other than that I don’t think so.

Ever meet someone famous?
Yeah, I remember when I was young and I met duff mckagan from GnR and I was dead excited haha… My mum also made me go and get a photo & say hi to Wayne Sleep when I was really young, I didn’t know who he was though!

What do you want to be when you grow up?
I wanted to be a Brown Felt Tip Pen when I was a kid!

GEORGE

GEORGE

a/s/l?

25/male/london.

Have you ever seen a dead body?
only roadkill.

Who is your favourite Simpsons character?
ive been thinking about this for way too long, im borderline obsessed with simpsons… Apart form a whole tonne of side characters like hank scorpio and troy mclore but lets you cant fuck with mains. homer is the man.

What T-Shirt are you wearing?
grief tourist t-shirt.

What did your last text message say?
‘ok cool thanks again. whine over.’

What’s the last song you listened to?
The rentals ‘summer girl‘.

How did you meet the people in your band?
weirdly through a advert which seems kinda crazy now…but yeah a freakin advert.

What’s the first record you bought?
‘mambo no 5 – a little bit of

What was your favourite VHS growing up?
the mask.

When was the last time you cried?
probably when my ex dumped my ass haha.

Have you ever kissed someone & regretted it?
nah…

Best Physical Feature?
my balls.

Worst physical feature?
my balls.

Reasonably ok/not bad feature that you’re not fussed about?
my balls.

Do you have any pets?
just the house mouse.

Ever picked up any injuries on tour?
nothing major.

What did you do for your last birthday?
went to spoons and a gig (got pissed).

Name something you CANNOT wait for?
recording the album and playing 2017 to the ground.

Do you have a crush on someone?
i fancy pretty much everyone.

What’s the shittest experience you’ve had as a musician?
hmmm not really an expeincence but when you rarely play with people who think there it because they play in a band. we all work jobs and get drunk…

If you could go back in time, how far would you go?
60s baby.

How do you want to die?
a way that dont know its happening (listening to sabbath).

What’s your favourite thing about pizza?
the sheer VERSA-TILL-ITY.

What are you craving right now?
another coffee.

Have you ever been on a horse?
nope.

What did you dream about last night?
if i did i cant remeber what it was…

If you could go back in time and kill the baby Hitler, would you?
slap the cunt.

Do you like Chinese food?
its alright nothing on indian.

Have you ever been on TV?
yeah.

Ever meet someone famous?
i guess so.

What do you want to be when you grow up?
a pro wrestler.

JOSEFINE

JOSEFINE

a/s/l?

24/female/london.

Have you ever seen a dead body?
Yes.

Who is your favourite Simpsons character?
JUB JUB the iguana.

What T-Shirt are you wearing?
A night Beats baseball shirt.

What did your last text message say?
Fuuuuuuck.

What’s the last song you listened too?
Neil Young – ‘Heart of Gold

How did you meet the people in your band?
Advertisement for a competent slap bass player, I talked them out of it.

What’s the first record you bought?
‘Hits for Kids’ compilation CD.

What was your favourite VHS growing up?
Snow White.

When was the last time you cried?
Can’t remember, I’m pretty cold hearted.

Have you ever kissed someone & regretted it?
My boyfriend.

Best Physical Feature?
My sexy bum.

Worst physical feature?
I have the forehead of a pug.

Reasonably ok/not bad feature that you’re not fussed about?
Thumbs.

Do you have any pets?
I have a cat but she lives in Sweden. She eats mice whole.

Ever picked up any injuries on tour?
Only the occasional bruises from getting hit by Charlie or Alex (accidentally).

What did you do for your last birthday?
Drank Margaritas with the band in LA.

Name something you CANNOT wait for?
Go back to the states.

Do you have a crush on someone?
Nah.

What’s the shittest experience you’ve had as a musician?
It’s all been shit – hot!

If you could go back in time, how far would you go?
Way back to a time before smart phones.

How do you want to die?
Like a Phoenix – to rise again.

What’s your favorite thing about pizza?
The addition of olives.

What are you craving right now?
A massage.

Have you ever been on a horse?
Ja!

What did you dream about last night?
That someone deposited 5 grand in my bank account.

If you could go back in time and kill the baby Hitler, would you?
No, but I’d probably tell his parents to keep an eye on him.

Do you like Chinese food?
Not really.

Have you ever been on TV?
Yes. As a child.

Ever meet someone famous?
Yes. I met John Paul Jones at a bass convention…

What do you want to be when you grow up?
Pippy fucking Longstockings.

Thee MVPs have just put out a new record! Ho-lee shit! Collecting together ten of the primest cuts from the early-to-present days, it’s a good starting point!
Listen to ‘Gravesend Song‘  and the whole ding-dong thing over at GoldFlakePaint!

Like what you see? Why not stick around and check out the other articles and interviews!
Don’t forget to follow Birthday Cake For Breakfast on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter!

 

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